Does a marrying couple usually pay for the travel cost for the guests coming to the wedding?

19 Jan 2010

19 Jan, 2010 Cost For Wedding

I and my boyfriend got engaged lately and planning to have a wedding.
Due to budget, we cannot afford a big wedding; we areplanning to have a small wedding with direct family members and close friends.
The problem is, we live in the middle point of both parents and frinends.
We decided to do so when we sarted to take our relationship seriously for fairness.
So now the question is are we supposed to pay for the traveling costs for the guests coming to our wedding?
If we did, it’s gonna cost more than the wedding itself. It is going to be $400 per guest at least.
Honestly, we cannot afford it.
Should we still manage to pay for those or how can we tell them about tavel costs?
Everybody know we are on tight budget and show understanding,
but some people still asking us if we are paying for the flights.
How to deal with it? Maybe we just shouldn’t have wedding at all?
Any suggestions or ideas appreciated.

I absolutely do not think that you should have to pay for your guests’ transportation to your wedding. I have only really heard of very wealthy families doing that.

I am from IL and come from a mid-class family. None of my family members have ever paid our transportation to a wedding for their son or daughter. My parents have traveled as far as Boston and Idaho for nieces and nephews weddings on their own dime.

Honestly, I think it is a lot to ask for you to pay the travel expenses of others. A lot of people where I am from won’t even pay for an open bar, let alone travel. You should not have to begin your married life with a buttload of debt.

Hopefully, some of them can ride together and share expenses.

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12 Responses

?
2010 Jan 19 1

I have never heard of the couple paying for the guests. My fiance and i are not paying for our guests, and they don’t expect it. If they are able to come to our wedding, that’s wonderful, but if they can’t afford it i’m sure they won’t come.
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?maggie?
2010 Jan 19 2

no but if you want to help them out on a personal level, like its REALLY important to you to have them there then you could help pay but ettiquitte says that guests pay for themselves.
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Butterfly ????????
2010 Jan 19 3

It is not customary for the couple to pay for travel costs for their guests. If you have several that we be staying overnight you can contact a local hotel and see if you can get a group rate and let your guests know.
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rrb
2010 Jan 19 4

No, you are not expected to pay for travel because attending a wedding is optional. If a guest can’t afford to attend your wedding then they don’t have to come. Only have the wedding you can pay for.
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Messykatt
2010 Jan 19 5

No, guests are responsible for their own travel. You can help at your end by researching local hotels and finding the best deals, or even blocking off some rooms if they’ll let you do a small block.

But it’s not good form for them to ask if you’re paying for the flights. Most poeple don’t.
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carefeecathy
2010 Jan 19 6

No way!
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dru21519
2010 Jan 19 7

I absolutely do not think that you should have to pay for your guests’ transportation to your wedding. I have only really heard of very wealthy families doing that.

I am from IL and come from a mid-class family. None of my family members have ever paid our transportation to a wedding for their son or daughter. My parents have traveled as far as Boston and Idaho for nieces and nephews weddings on their own dime.

Honestly, I think it is a lot to ask for you to pay the travel expenses of others. A lot of people where I am from won’t even pay for an open bar, let alone travel. You should not have to begin your married life with a buttload of debt.

Hopefully, some of them can ride together and share expenses.
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Doodlestuff
2010 Jan 19 8

No, you do not have to pay for your guests. However, taking the middle point isn’t always the wisest choice as you are making EVERYBODY pay a lot. Either have your wedding where your parents are or just have a destination wedding with only your immediate family.
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cem08
2010 Jan 19 9

Unless I was completely rich, no you dont pay for their travel costs, they do. Its an important day in your life, and it should mean something to your close family and friends.
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gramof6
2010 Jan 19 10

No you are not expected to pay for your guests lodging.
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Texas girl and happy wifey!
2010 Jan 19 11

All we did was block off some rooms at a hotel to get a discount price, but the guests had to pay for themselves.
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Jahnna
2010 Jan 19 12

No, the guest pay for their own travel expenses and lodging. Very often, the couple will have a hotel reserve a block of rooms for their guests. This just means they hold the room until the day before the wedding, and if it’s not booked by one of your guests by that time, they release the room for other guests to use.

A nice touch is to have a small gift for your guests in their rooms. This can be something as simple as a few snacks and bottled water in a gift bag with a note thanking them for coming. If you want to go more elaborate, it can include a certificate for a massage at the hotel health club, a manicure for the woman, or a gift card for a nearby restaurant. You can even stick in some maps of the city and information on the area. Include customized directions from their hotel to the church/ceremony site to help them find their way. Maybe arrange for a close friend to be an emergency contact for guests in case they get lost. Give them a card with the person’s name and cell number on it.

Remember, it’s not so much the amount you spend as it is about making your guests feel welcomed and appreciated.
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Wedding Cost